How to choose a celebrant

Q: What do we need to know in order to be sure the celebrant we choose delivers the type and quality of ceremony we want? - Tom, Wodonga, Australia

A: Choosing the right celebrant probably the single most important choice you have to make. The choice you make will affect the outcome of your ceremony more than any other decision. If the celebrant you choose ultimately does not listen to you (and by that I mean not just what you say, but what motivates you to say it), does not support you (your ceremony is about meeting your needs, not fitting in with the business and ego needs of the celebrant), does not inspire you, and does not connect with your ideas for your ceremony, you have not only wasted your money, you will have potentially destroyed your dreams and sullied your memories of what should have been a wonderful and unique occasion.

So you need to ensure that the celebrant you choose is someone you can trust, someone you feel comfortable with. When the time for your ceremony arrives you should feel confident about what is about to transpire and nurtured by the process by which the celebrant assisted you to arrive at this point.

I suggest you contact each one on your short list and ask the following questions (and any others that are important to you)

• Whether they are free to do the type of ceremony at the time and on the day you want in the place you want
• What their celebrancy qualifications are (skills and training are important. Experience is also important but it is sometimes hard to gauge whether someone who claims 10 years experience has really had 10 years experience or one year 10 times, or indeed 1 ceremony 500 times)
• Whether they use a standard ceremony, give you a choice of prewritten ceremonies, or write a unique ceremony
• What process they use to gather information from you on your needs and wants (you also need to get a sense of how well they will get to know you during the process)
• Whether they will have a meeting with you before the day
• Whether a rehearsal is included in the charge
• What sort of certificate is provided
• If any special needs you have will be met, and how
• What sort of resources and information they will provide you with and how much support they will give you as you work through the decisions that need to be made about your ceremony
• What they charge and what is included in the price and whether there are any "add-on" costs.

The reason I suggest you leave price until last is that knowing what you are going to get for your money allows you to compare on value for money as well as on price. And value includes how much effort the celebrant will put into the preparation and development phase as well as in the delivery phase.

Whatever the type of ceremony, making memories is a very important aspect. What you pay and the value for money the celebrant delivers can decide what sort of memories you end up with.

Have a wonderful ceremony ...